Since I wasn't sure how I would respond to the altitude here in Albuquerque, I came to the Land of Enchantment a few weeks early to acclimate. By the weekend of the meet, I was excited to race, but I was also pretty excited to just go home. The idea of standing up next to all these big-name, sponsored athletes while I wear my mix-n-match of every brand imaginable was a bit intimidating.
I must have communicated that somehow in a conversation to my mom, and the way she responded was exactly what I needed to hear. She told me to remember that I belong here. That I am just as capable of becoming a big-name sponsored athlete too, but I have to put myself out there and earn it first. And I can be homesick at times, but when I step to the line, that is the only place I need to be. For about two minutes, I can invest my entire self into every step, every heartbeat, every moment of the race...because as much as I try to feel sorry for myself before a race, when the pressure is on, and I am a little bit afraid of failing- it's true there is nowhere else I'd rather be than in every moment of that amazing opportunity God has provided me.
And now I'm back, decked out in my Asics gear, another year stronger and more experienced. One would think I've got it all figured out by now, but I don't think anyone ever really does, no matter how successful they are. I'm still reminding myself of my mom's advice, and saying, "this is where I am, this is where I'm meant to be." Whether my performance is good or bad, I will find joy in my current circumstances, and approach every experience as a stepping stone towards where I want to be. Where I want to be is what propels me.
|2010 USA Indoor 800m Final|
|I put it all out there|
|I ran for no regrets|
|I finished 3rd place with a new indoor 800m PR|